Affairs with the Maids
by Flamist.Rika
Summary: Hoping that Zetsu and Kakuzu can learn somethings about girls and relationships, Pein gives each of them a girl and lets them do what they please with them.But when they become the base maids, there could be some-issues-in the gang. KakuOC ZetsuOC
1. Assigned

Affairs with the Maids

Chapter 1- Assigned

--

"Quick, Miyuki, in here!" Her friend urged, dragging Miyuki by the wrist, into an abandoned warehouse.

They quickly searching for a hiding spot, and when they located one, vanished into it. They tried to slow their breathing, hoping to Kami, they weren't found by the two pairs of people, who slaughtered their village.

"Kihari, grab your tail!" Miyuki squeaked.

"Then grab yours!" Kihari whispered back.

They covered one an-others mouths, was they heard foot steps. They tried to keep quiet- but the fear of being killed like their fellow villagers, put then on edge and made them far more skittish than the two best friends usually were.

"Crap- where's those two go?" A male voice hissed lowly.

"Shut up, Hidan. If you don't like games, then get the hell out." Another male said what sounded a bit irritated.

"Maybe I fucking will!" The first male snarled, the sound of his foot steps, growing further and further away.

Apparently, the killers lost interest in finding the two girls, and they listened to their distant foot steps fade into nothingness. They gave almost silent sighs.

"What if they're still here, Ki-Chan?" Miyuki asked quietly.

"I don't really sense their chakra- but not like it would care- what do they want with a pair of high school girls like us, anyways?" Her friend whispered back airily, making Miyuki nervous.

"They're twice our size, Ki-Chan!" Miyukiwhispered back frantically. "And without Oran or Hoshi-Kun, we really can't defend ourselves if they try to hurt us!"

"They're gone, don't worry about it." Kihari said back reassuringly, crawling out of their hiding place, helping her friend out as well. They stood, each had a hand over their heart, and each tried to slow their breathing. "Phew- glad that's over and done with-"

There was a scream, and Kihari whipped around, growling, seeing some one holding Miyuki above the ground by the neck, Miyuki struggling as she tried to breathe.

"Let my Oneii-chan Go, damn it!" Kihari snarled, attacking the Male's arm, instantly sinking her fangs into it, making Miyuki's attacker drop her on the ground, as they shook their arm violently, trying to get Kihari to let go.

"Miyuki, withdraw!" Kihari yelled in her friend's direction. Miyuki ran away, as Kihari swung herself up onto the Male's arm, and kicked them in the face with the spiked heel of her assassin boots, before jumping off and running after Miyuki.

Kihari put her hands together in a seal, before there was a pop and cloud of heavy smoke. The two males, coughed and hacked, thanks to Kihari's dust smoke.

"We lost 'em!" Kihari smiled, before there was a click, and the two fell down a hidden trap door. They fell onto something, but rolled on to their sides, before quickly getting up, and looking around.

They ran around what seemed to be a lower entrance level, but they exited the warehouse, into a strange meadow.

"What the-?"

"Hi girls- how was your walk?"

Kihari whipped around, her eyes glowing green, to a tall, white-haired, purple-eyed, male. Kihari glared at him, moving Miyuki behind her, only to have someone grab her. Kihari hissed angrily, before the white-haired boy came up and grabbed her from behind.

"Wow, you're fiesty- I like that-" The male said smoothly in her ear, growling.

"Hidan! Wait until Leader assigns her to you, before you just up and rape her." The man behind Miyuki growled. "Hidan" let out a groan and withdrew, before shoving the girl to the ground on her stomach- the other boy, was much kinder with Miyuki. Kihari panicked, and whipped her head around to look at her friend. The two began communicating in barks and whines, but soon stopped, when questioned what their names were, or if they spoke Japanese.

Kihari defiantly, bit Hidan's wrist, making the man holding Miyuki, growl.

"Make her stop." He ordered. Miyuki swallowed, repeating the order to Kihari, who glanced at her, before releasing Hidan's wrist with ease, and laying her head back on the ground.

Their hands were tied, and the two were thrown over their respective captor's shoulder, before being carried away.

& Akatsuki Base &

"Ugh- none of those girls were even remotely 'cute'- aside from the ones we caught." Hidan said, strolling into his partner's room, and dropping his catch, on the large bed.

"Hn." Zetsu replied simply, taking care, to make sure his catch wasn't hurt in anyway, when he placed her next to the other girl.

"Kakuzu, watch these two. Careful though- they're the seductive type-" Hidan teased, before leaving, followed closely by Zetsu. Zetsu stopped in the door way, and looked back at his catch for a moment, hoping the Leader would deem his "score" high enough, to let him keep her. He left fter Hidan, shutting the door behind him.

"Ugh- why am **I**always left with them?" Kakuzu complained quietly, getting back to his work, often distracted, by the two girls talking amongst themselves quietly, when they weren't leaning against one another, napping.

(1 hour later)

The bedroom door opened, and a disappointed Hidan entered, a scowl on his face.

"Fucking damn! Why can't I get one?" He questioned Zetsu, who shrugged.

"You fail at life-"

"Shut up and just get your fucking doll!" Hidan snarled angrily, looking at his partner in envy. "You get one too, bastard-"

Kakuzu looked up for a moment, before looking back at his paper work

"I didn't request a girl-" He said coldly.

"I wouldn't be complaining! The brown-haired one is hawt!" Hidan hissed in jealousy.

"Shut up, cry baby."Kakuzu said, pausing to look up. Zetsu picked up the blue-haired girl with the raccoon ears and her large, but cute, raccoon tail. Leaving an unwilling and reluctant Kakuzu, with the brown-haired girl with her little pair of red-brown fox ears and little fox tail, sitting on his bed. She hissed and spat, at Zetsu, Hidan holding her back, from attacking him.

Kakuzu sighed. "Get out Hidan."

Hidan did so, but not without muttering and hissing curses under his breath, as he shut the door and Kakuzu untied his new fox-girl.

Recently, Pein, had though, since Orochimaru had married some animal-thing- (She, actually, is half-fox, half-dragon), that everyone in the Akatsuki, should have a little animal girlfriend of their own- less stress.

Well- looks like they'd have to deal.


	2. Getting Acquainted

Affairs with the Maids

Chapter 2- Getting Acquainted

--

(With Zetsu)

His girl sat on his dark forest-green comforted bed, looking at the door, which was closed, sadly.

"Mew- moeeww- meeew- meooow-" She cried, whimpering and making short but sad, sounds.

"Please stop- what's wrong? Do you want something? Is that it, girlie?" Zetsu asked, panicking a bit. He'd never been alone in a room with a girl before- and he'd never dated anyone- so he didn't know what to do. Well- he did know he wanted her to stop- he didn't want her crying like she was.

"A-Are you hungry or something? Want to get some breakfast?"**"You're a stoner- what type of question is THAT?!"**"Shut up!"

There was the sound of sharp tapping and rapping, making Zetsu look up. She was scratching on the door. obviously, wanting out, still crying sadly and lonely. He went up to her and pulled her away from the door.

**"Stop that, girl!"**"What's your name?"

She looked at him.

"M-mi-miy-miyu-miyuk-miyuki." She said, trying to say it as best as she could, with great difficulty. Zetsu was patient, looking at her.

"Miyuki?"

Her small raccoon ears, perked, to him testing her name, to see if she was lying. Zetsu smirked.

"Ok, Miyuki- I'll take you out, but you have to promise to stay close to me, ok?" Zetsu asked in a kinder tone, getting a nod. Get grabbed her hand, opening the door, before leading her out of his room.

(With Kakuzu)

Unfortunately, Kakuzu wasn't progressing as much with his girl, as Zetsu was. His girl, had written her name, on a piece of paper, and refused to listen to any of his orders, doing the exact opposite.

"Damn it, sit down!" He yelled.

"Pfft!" His girl, Kihari, replied, sticking her tongue out at him, before sticking her nose in the air. Eventually, she sat down.

"Ha!" Kakuzu said, so flustered by her defiance, at her actually sitting down, made him feel victorious. But it was short-lived, because Kihari flipped him off with little to no emotion.

"You irrogant little fox bitch!" He snarled. Her ears perked, and her tail flicked, before she dashed to the door, scratching on it.

"Stop that!Oh no-keep scratching my door, Kihari." Kakuzu said, starting to get the hang of her little game. Kihari let out an aggravated hiss, her tail puffed out, and her ears twitched in irritation, that he had made this discovery, before she stopped scratching on his door. She growled and whimpered at the door.

"Ok-um- Don't come over her and tell me why your scratching my door."

Kihari growled the entire length of crossing the room to his desk chair, where he sat. She snorted and looked away, a slight pink hue on her cheeks.

"M-Miyu- Mikyuki." Was all she said.

"What was that?" Kakuzu mocked. "I couldn't hear you."

Her head snapped around and she glared at him, before hitting him up-side the back of his head, pointing to the door, growling.

"Miyuki!" Kihari repeated angrily, but when Kakuzu didn't reply, she rolled her eyes and stomped over to the door, fidgeting with the locked door knob.

It took her a minute, to figure out that the door could be locked and unlocked. She cleverly unlocked it, dashing out of the room. Kakuzu got up and went after her.

"Hey! Get back here NOW!" He yelled, stopping in the hall. Kihari was hissing and spitting angrily, as she was hugged by a blue-eyed blonde.

"You're so kawaii,yeah!" He smiled cattily,nuzzling her hair.

"Deidara- don't...!"

Too late. Kihari had already snarled and bit Deidara's neck angrily, struggling in his arms, trying to get out.

"You you like it rough, yeah?" Deidara smirked, before Kihari was snatched away and put down. Kakuzu's black tentacle strings were out, and he sent one to pierce Deidara's skull.

Kihari's tail wagged, and she gave a short but happy bark, before biting the tentacle, making it barely scratch the blond's cheek. she gnawed on it continuously, until her ears perked and tuned to the side, making her stop.

"No." A shy female voice said, making Kihari stop instantly. after a while, she released the tentacle gently, before looking around the corner of the hall they were in.

"Miyuki!" Kihari smiled, before a pair of arms were hooked under her own, lifting her up.

"Come, let's go to my room, yeah-"

Kakuzu kicked Deidara away. "Back off. Pein gave her to ME, not you." He hissed, grabbing her hand, keeping her behind him.

"Fine! I'll ask leader for my own, yeah!" Deidara cried, marching off to the Leader's room, and vanishing into it.

The two animal girls spotted one another, smiling, before glancing at their "owners", and keeping every thing just at that- smiling. Zetsu lightly pulled his girl's hand, wanting to move on, Miyuki complying. Kihari dragged Kakuzu behind her, as she tried to keep up with her friend, who looked back at her with a relaxed and happy expression.

(When the words are italics, that means Miyuki and Kihari, are talking to one nother in their own language, kay?)

The two stayed quiet for while, before Kihari looked at Zetsu, then Miyuki.

_"He's tall as hell-" _Kihari squeaked, before grinning. _"I can still take his ass down-"_

_"No,Kihari, be nice to Zet-San!"_

_"Don't tell me- you're already getting acquainted, aren't you?"_

_"I-It might n-not be a-all t-that b-bad-"_

_"Well- your master is kinda strange-"_

_"Well your master is a rag doll!"_

_"Its not!"_

_"Is too! "_

Kihari stopped and unbuttoned the first three buttons, of Kakuzu's Akatsuki Cloak, peeping in, before re buttoning it, and continued walking.

_"I'm sorry I made you mad, Miyuki- You're right, he is a complete rag doll." _Kihari purred, before Kakuzu picked her up, when he was able to get his footing.

Miyuki squeaked.

_"I'm jealous, Ki-Chan! Your master is so romantic! Zet-Sama hasn't been like that to me at all!"_

_"He's a bastard! He's not "romantic"! Arf! Put me down, douche FAG!" _

Kihari hissed and spat, pounding on Kakuzu's back with her fists. Kakuzu growled.

"Keep on doing that!" He snarled.

_So he caught onto your game, Ki-Chan?"_

_"Tch- told you he was a douche bag..."_

_"You should be nicer- maybe he'll be nicer back?"_

_"Prove it."_

_"I could have hurt Zet-Sama- but I sat on his bed and called for you-"_

_"I heard that."_

_"-He took me out and now, I'm getting breakfast. Are you getting breakfast, Ki-Chan?"_

_"...Fuck no..."_

_"Then be nice. Oh- what have you said in their language so far? My first word was your name-"_

_"I said yours"_

_"Can I tell them?"_

_"Tch- tell them, don't tell them, it doesn't really matter. I doubt they'll get us to speak ANYWAYS-"_

Miyuki hugged Zetsu's arm. _"I think Zet-Sama can do it!"_

_"Whatever-"_

Kihari abruptly bit Kakuzu's shoulder, trying to get his attention, and it worked.

"Have fun trying to figure out, how to get us to speak more often, dumb ass." Kihari smirks, yawning. "Bored." She started simply, before sinking her teeth back into his shoulder where she had bitten him. She let her fangs hang in the exact puncture holes casually, plugging them nicely, stopping the blood.

"Ki-Chan- does that when she's bored- a lot." Miyuki squeaked quietly, Kakuzu shrugged.

"I'll buy her a coloring book or something." He said lightly, grabbing Kihari's swift wrist with ease, stopping her kunai attack to his spine. He smirked. "I'm smarter than I LOOK, little girl."

_"PH-LEASE! You're as smart as a box of friggin ROCKS, jerk!"_

Zetsu ignored the two and curved his lips to a kind smile at his little girl.

"Breakfast?" He questioned.

"Okay,Zet-Sama!" She smiled.


	3. Important

**EVERYONE WHO READS THIS STORY!**

**I wish to thank you all for your support and for reading this. But, I'm saddened to say, that I have no ideas for my stories.**

**If I have no ideas, then I delete the story all together.**

**So, if you like this story, and wish for it to continue, or to read a possible upcoming sequel to this story, then all you need to do is the following:**

**1) Send a message to Flamist.Rika, or review.**

**2) If sending a message, please make sure you put the name of the story, as the first line, and skip a line, like so;**

* * *

l Compose Private Message (EXAMPLE)

To: Flamist.Rika

From: (Your username here or anonymous)

Message: (Name of Story Here)

(Skip a line)

(idea, suggestion, comment, thoughts- basically what you wish to say- here)

**Well, thank you for reading this, and please- I don't want to delete a story, everyone likes so much. If someone likes it and shows it to their friend, to find it is no longer there, they will just be very confused and sad.**

**So please, help me with ideas, so that these stories may contine- thank you.**

**Sincerely, Ryu**


	4. Maids

Affairs with the Maids

Chapter 3- Maids

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# Kakuzu's Room #

"Say something." Kakuzu said, keeping eye contact with her. He held up a gummy fish in between their staring contest. "Say something, and you get the fish. Come on-" He waved it in front of her face. "-you know you want it-"

"Fuck you!"

"Ugh, this is POINTLESS!" Kakuzu groaned, tossing the fish to his little animal girl, in defeat. Her eyes flashed, and she jumped up and caught it in her mouth, swallowing it down easily, before sitting back on the bed. Her eyes held a momentary blood-lust, as she licked her lips.

She had told him before, she was sick of the fish, and actually wanted meat. But Kakuzu refused her of her desired meals, and told her to stick to the Swedish fish she liked so much. He closed his eyes, tossing her a pack of coloring pencils, and a coloring book,before getting up and leaving the room.

"Sunny D-"

"Get it yourself. Oh, that's right! You haven't been good, so you CAN'T." Kakuzu mocked, making Kihari growl.

"Shut your mouth, rag-doll!" /She growled, before he shut the door, leaving her to narrow her eyes.

_'Stupid- I guess I'll have to behave-' _She looked up and saw an air vent, before giving a wicked and evil sneer. _'Or not-'_

# Zetsu's Room #

Zetsu entered his room, only to be tackled by happy Miyuki.

"Let's play! Let's play!" Zetsu shook his head.

"No, Miyuki, I can't play right-"

"Why?" He got up and put her down.

"I have a mission today-"

Miyuki went quiet, she looked down. "Oh- o-ok." She smiled up at him weakly. "When are you getting back?"

"Dunno, when the mission's finished-" Zetsu looked at her, before sighing. "I'll try to finish it quickly, but until then, I'll have to figure out what I'm going to do with you."

He walked over and sat on the bed, rubbing his temples. "How irritating- I don't want to go on the mission, because if I do, then that'll leave you alone. And what are you supposed to do while I'm gone?! Shit- one of the other guys can pick on you while I'm out, and I won't be able to do anything because I won't be here. And then if you get harassed, they'll keep it all "hush-hush", and- UGH!"

Miyuki smiled cutely at him. "Kihari-Chan."

Zetsu looked up. "Huh?"

"Oh- um- I was saying, Kihari-Chan, because, she can- um- help me while you're gone. And I like cleaning, so that'll entertain me- but you're room's already clean." Miyuki explained. "Do you have maids that keep this place clean?"

"Not at all-"

She gave him a pair of huge puppy eyes. "Can I be a maid here? I'll keep the base clean while you're gone, and I'll entertain myself. I'll be good too! A-And if I can get Ki-Chan to help me too, then she can make sure I don't get picked on!"

Miyuki was experienced in conversations and, if she needed to, get what she wanted. She knew that every debate- every thing that was impossible- had to be backed up with nothing but facts- and lots of them.

_'Remember- facts win you the argument, sweetie.You want that Coach purse and you want the most popular boy in school to get it for you? Charm. Charm is knowing facts, about how we girls work our 'magic', on the boys- we use them to our advantage, girlie.' _Kihari had said once. _'The next thing you know, you'll be bragging about how the school's king, got you a Coach back, and you really didn't do anything but MENTION, what you wanted it.'_

Zetsu only nodded and told her to wait for him, while he went to go tell Kihari's Master, about it. Miyuki looked at the bed sheets.

_'When- was the last time- I saw the ocean?' _Miyuki thought quietly.

# Kakuzu's Room #

Kakuzu nodded. "Well, she's quite the tactical little-girl." He commented. He looked from Zetsu to Kihari. "I have a mission today too- would you like to do that, Kihari? The maid thing?"

"I already said yes-" Kihari came out of the bathroom, wearing a maid outfit, tugging at the skirt in hopes of pulling it down farther. "Oh, you motherfucker! You got it in the wrong size, didn't you?!"

"I thought you were a double A-" Kakuzu said innocently, looking at her chest.

"Obviously, if it doesn't FIT, then I must not be a double A! Gawd, My outfit is just screaming,'somebody rape me!', thank you!" Kihari complained, Zetsu left to give Miyuki's uniform to her, as Kakuzu tried to fix Kihari's "problem". "You did this on purpose- stupid rag-doll-"

"My, you're talkitive - something happen today?"

"You being a jerk and getting me a super small maid outfit. To the point, where my boobs are basically popping out of my shirt, nothing happened. I'm not very happy, punk." Kihari said bitterly, blushing, looking away, as he tried to sew up her shirt. He let out a growl, before abandoning his cause, and going to his closet. He rummaged around for something, until he pulled out a night shirt.

"Christ- if you didn't have such a big chest, I wouldn't have to do this-"

"Do what, stitch-face?" Kihari questioned heatedly, before he pulled the shirt over her head, grabbing her hand, and dragging her out of his room, and to the nearest town.

(Later)

"Alright girls, We're off-"  
Zetsu smiled.

"You'd better fucking behave, Kihari, or I swear to god-" Kakuzu threatened. Kihari yawned, looking away.

"Have a god time, Rag doll- if you get hurt, I don't care-"

"Why not?"

"You're a Rag Doll! You can put yourself back together, stupid ass!" Kihari snarled.

"Makes sense." Zetsu pointed out, walking over to Miyuki. He kissed her forehead. "Don't get into trouble."

Miyuki blushed, before climbing onto her tip-toes, and licking his cheek swiftly and bashfully, as he withdrew. Kihari let out a growl.

"Hey,hey! Don't lick him, Mi-Chan! You hardly know the bitch!" Kihari scolded, before swiftly wrapping an arm around her friend's head, from behind her. "And you! Back the hell off! Don't you be doing that to my Mi-Chan-"

"Technically, she's mine-" Zetsu said, before Kihari gave a snort.

"Don't make me break my foot off in your ass, punk! Get going!" Kihari growled, kicking Kakuzu away from her, when he approached her, to see how'd she react to the same thing. "Get going!" Kihari smiled at them, putting a fist on her chest. "Don't worry- I got Miyuki's back. She'll be fine, even if it means getting the blame, she'll be fine Zetsu-Sama."

Zetsu smirked, nodding, before leaving with Kakuzu.


	5. Kakuzu, the Saint

A/N: Before we begin, I'd like to say how sorry I am for making all of you wait so long. I was grounded. I have a new computer in my room that does not have Internet (yet, hopefully, it will) I edit and create all my chapters on said computer- and I lost my cell phone.

I'm sorry it's so long. I'd also like to thank my readers, who helped me so much. **Thanks for your idea on the Hidan thing- you know who you are, my friend!**

* * *

Affairs with the Maids

Chapter 4- Kakuzu, the Saint

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Miyuki looked at her friend.

"Um- Ki-Chan- what are we supposed to do?" Kihari gave her a smirk.

"We're maids, yes? Maids clean, so, we'll clean." Kihari said delicately. Miyuki clapped her hands.

"Ok, ok!"

"Let's Go to every room in this place, and get everyone's laundry-" Miyuki gasped.

"You'll be doing boys' laundry- Zet-Sama told me there aren't any other girls here but us-"

"Miyuki- you seem to have forgotten- I had 8 brothers and my father- I can do guy laundry."

Miyuki gave her a weak smile. "You still have two brothers left-"

"Eh, true."

--later--

'knock,knock,knock'

"Coming,yeah!"

Deidara opened his door, before his mouth dropped.

A pair of girl in french maid uniforms, stood in front of his door. One had short blue hair, that went to her mid-neck, with an adorable pair of raccoon ears, plus a cute, fluffy, and long, raccoon tail. The other had long, wavy but curly, brown hair. She had a pair of reddish-brown fox ears and a matching vixen tail. The maid outfit top, really didn't seem to be in either girl's size.

"Good afternoon." The blue-haire done said.

"We're the new maids for the Akatsuki-" The brown-haired one said. Deidara nodded to her.

"I remember you. You're Kakuzu's girlfriend, yeah, hm." The brown-haired ones eyes went a little wide, before she gave him a kind smile.

"Yes, I remember you now- you were the one who was sexually harassing me-" She said.

The blue-haired one, giggled, bending over a bit more before bouncing back to the position she was in before. "It's laundry day!"

"But my laundry day was last week, yeah." Deidara said.

"Ya nastay." The brown-haired girl muttered. "Anyways, it doesn't matter. We're the maids, and WE say, it's laundry day. So get you damn laundry-" She turned halfway, and pointed to the laundry trolley that the blue-haired female was behind, pushing along.

Deidara nodded, getting his dirty laundry, and dropping it in the cart, before giving the brown-haired girl a sexy smirk. "Hey, I just got a new stereo and some new Cd's," His smirk grew. "So, you wanna jam out to some new tunes with me, babe?" Deidara growled sexily, wrapping an arm around the vixen's waist, pulling her against him.

"How about NOT, douche bag?!" She growled, junk-punching him in the stomache,making the suicide bomber grunt in pain, releasing her. "Bad boy! Stay in your room." She said, raising a her right leg, before pushing him back into his room, with her black high-heel, before she shut his door and turned to face her friend with a sigh.

"Most of these guys must be real ladies' men. But they think they can get any damn girl they want, and they probably fuckin' can." She said, looking at Miyuki. " Who's left on the list Pein-Sama made us?"

"Um- 'Hidan'" Miyuki said, crossing off the blond from their little list of Akatsuki members. Kihari smirked.

"Ooh! Sounds violent-" She said sarcastically, giggling, before gesturing her friend to follow her. "Come on."

They knocked on Hidan's door.

"Who is it?"

"Laundry Service. Please hand over your dirty laundry so it can be cleaned and returned to you." Kihari called. There was no response, making her knock again. "Hey! Are you fucking paying attention to me? I said hand over yer goddamn laundry, PUNK!" She twisted the door knob, to find the door unlocked. Curiosity, pushed her to slowly open the door, before she gasped.

"Oh my gawd! Miyuki, go find some rags and a mop or something!"

Miyuki quickly did what she as told, Kihari ran into the room. a male with snow-white hair, lay on the ground in some type of tribal circle or something. there was a puddle of blood around him, and there were several sharp objects stabbed through his chest. Kihari took in the scene, slowly walking around the sacrificial sight. She took his clothes and threw them into the trolley, before going into his bathroom and finding a towel, which she wet with cold water, and rung out to make it damp.

"Ohmygawd-" She whispered in quite disbelief and irritation, beginning to wipe up all of, what she presumed, was the Male's blood. When the towel was dyed with his blood, Miyuki returned with the mop. "Why don't you take the cart to the laundry room? Just do whites for now, ok?"

"Ok." Miyuki replied.

"Shut the door, please, Mi-Chan. I don't want anyone coming in and messing with me while I try to help this guy." Miyuki nodded, closing the door with a soft 'click!' of the door knob.

Kihari removed all of the weapons from the man's torso, examining their beauty for a moment, before wiping them clean, and placing them in the sword holder, that hung on the wall. It seemed to be the home of all hi blades to her. She shivered at the thought, that the Akatsuki members, would assassinate their fellow peers. It seemed so- stupid- to Kihari, on why they would do this.

Kihari knelt next to him, wrapping her arms around his chest, hauling him up with an enormous amount of effort. He was WAY heavier than he freaking looked. She dragged him over to the bed, and did the best she could with that little strength she could muster at the moment, to lay him down on the mattress. Kihari abandoned the male for a moment to mop up the remaining blood on the floor. It didn't take long for her to clean up the mess, but she put away the mop and took the bloody towel, to the laundry room.

(With Hidan)

I let out a yawn and stretched. Best nap I ever had, if I do say so my-

I looked down at my chest. It was spotless. not a single speck of blood anywhere- not even on my ritual circle. Impossible. My dirty clothes were gone too- floor looked clean. What the hell was going ON?! I was on my bed too.

I laid back down and closed my eyes, trying to replay what happened. I came into my room after my mission. Then, I started my ritual to Jasin, my beloved god, and said ritual included thrusting swords through my chest. Then, after sacrificing myself and offering my dear god my blood to thank him for my immortality, I took a nap. And- now- I'm no my bed, my floor is spotless, my swords are clean and in their holder, and my chest is clean.

I heard the clicking of high-heels, so I kept my eyes shut. The person came closer to me, then went into my bathroom, giving me the chance to open my eyes.

(With Kihari)

She returned to Hidan's room, going over to his bed and making sure he was still there, before going to the bathroom to wash her hands.

_'I'll have to check his pulse-' _Kihari thought, going back to the bed.

She sighed, grabbing his wrist, putting both her index and middle finger together, to check his pulse. Nothing. Damn. This meant she had to actually get closer to him. She groaned, climbing onto the bed, kneeling down, putting her fingers to his throat. Still, no heart beat. Kihari leaned over him, and put her ear on his chest, listening, but she heard nothing.

She thought she was going to have to give him mouth-to-mouth before a deep and strong voice said,

"Surprise."

She let out a gasp, as she was pinned to the bed. She looked up into the bright purple eyes, of a snow-white haired man. He smirked as she glared at him. "Mother fucker!"

"Hey, I remember you, cutie." He declared, giving her a cheetah-like growl. "You're Kakuzu's foxy little Vixen girl, right?"

"Who the hell wants to know?!" She snapped, making his smirk widen, and the tightness of his grip lighten a little.

"I guess I never introduced myself- I'm Hidan. So," Hidan leaned down to her ear. "What do I call you?"

"Miss I-m-gonna-break-my-foot-off-in-your-ass, if you don't get the hell offa' me!" Kihari snarled, before Hidan nipped at her neck. She kneed him in the chest with a growl, before backing away from him, resting her back on the head board of his bed.

"You know, I think you're a total hottie- and you're in a position, where I can totally, take advantage of you." Hidan said, putting a hand on each side of her, on the headboard, trapping her. In a swift move, he had her sandwiched between his body and the wood of the head board.

Kihari tried to do the classical 'screaming for help' thing, but Hidan caught onto this.

"I don't think so-" He sneered, before crashing his mouth against hers, painfully enough, to bruise her lips. On this thought alone, he withdrew, and kissed her again in the same was, but with less force. She struggled against him, trying to put some space between them, without success. His kisses her demanding and lustful, and she wanted him OFF.

Hidan pulled away from her, before giving her a lustful and sadistic grin.

"I wonder- what you taste like-" He whispered in her ear, before picking her up in his arms, and getting off his bed. He dropped her on his pillows, before climbing on top of her, and forcefully kissing her again. Hidan reached up before opening her mouth by putting his thumb on her chin, and pulling down her lower jaw, slipping his tongue into her mouth to search every single space and crevice. Hidan smirked when he earned himself a small moan from his victim. She had a taste similar to green apple that just made his mouth water, and leave him wanting more, every time he resurfaced to give them both a breath of air.

Kihari still struggled under him, squirming, trying to get out from under him desperately. Hidan had lost the ability to hold back, he just couldn't help himself anymore. He didn't care she was Kakuzu's- and the consequences jabbed at him no longer- he wanted her all to himself. Hidan's hands traveled up the sides of her thighs slowly, making her shiver under him, and try to stop him from going further. He broke the kiss, resting his left cheek on her right shoulder, letting his gaze linger on his hands that were making their way up her legs. He turned enough, to take in her scent, making a sleepy little smile, appear on his lips.

"Stop it! Get your hands off of my you fucking pig!"

Her hateful voice and her words that dripped heavily with venom and hostility, made him snap back to reality.

"I'm not a pig, woman!" He snapped

His hands left her thighs, and went straight to the tied white shirt behind her corset top, attacking the string that held the shirt together and kept from showing her chest. He kissed her neck while he worked on untying her shirt, nibbling her and there.

"I'll make sure you know my name by the time you leave, because I'll be making you_ moan _it all _night_!" He hissed in her ear. Her rebelliousness and how fiesty was a turn-on to him. Hidan wanted to bang her so bad it _hurt_, to keep going at the pace he was. He hungrily pressed his lips against hers, shoving his tongue in, getting a defiant moan from her.

He pulled down the straps of her uniform, before he went and worked on getting her outfit off entirely, before the door was kicked open. Hidan withdrew and looked up, to see someone he hardly expected at that moment.

"Hey, Kakuzu, what's happenin?" He said, giving his partner, a weak smirk.

Kakuzu's eyebrow twitched, before his eyes flashed. Kakuzu punched Hidan in the face, throwing him off of the bed. Kihari hastily tried to cover herself, now that she was in Kakuzu's plain sight. She was picked up and carried out of Hidan's room.

"K-Ki-Chan!" Miyuki cried, when she was out in the hallway. Zetsu stood next to her. Kakuzu, glared down at Kihari.

"You're fucking grounded, girl." He said angrily. Kihari said nothing, just staring at him, blushing slightly. She rested her head on his chest. Right now- Kakuzu was saint in her eyes.


	6. Punishing

Affairs with the Maids

Chapter 5- Punishment

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Kihari sat on her little hammock, Kakuzu had gotten her. Because he thought she'd get her fur all over his damn comforter.

"Mother fucker" She hissed at him.

"Speak a language I understand." He hissed back.

"Can I-"

"Whatever the hell it is, NO."

"Asshole!" Kihari snarled. "I can't go and get myself breakfast?"

He irritately looked up from his paper. "What do you want? I'll get it."

"Snake. I want snake meat, for breakfast." She said smugly, making him growl, and pick up the phone. He dialed a number, waiting a moment.

"Orochimaru? This is Kakuzu. You forgot some of your...pets... in your room. I'd suggest you come and get them, before my girl gets to them... I don't care if you're busy right now. Come and get your damn snakes." He hung up, smirking at her deviously. "Oops. Looks like there will be no breakfast for you, Kihari." He said darkly, before getting back to his paper.

Kihari growled, tugging at her collar. Kakuzu had chained her to the pole of her hammock, to make sure she couldn't leave unless he undid the latch on her collar. She had enough length of chain, to explore the room as much as she wanted. But, he positioned it, so she would never be able to get out of the door or through the vent. There was a knock at the door.

"Kaku-Sama, can Miyuki come and see Kihari?"

"Yes."

Miyuki entered his room, smiling at Kihari. "Ki-Chan, I brought you breakfast."

Kihari gave her a fond smile, touched by how nice Miyuki was to bring her breakfast- Rattle snake at that! Kihari thanked her friend, before digging in. Zetsu entered.

"Kakuzu, would you like me to watch Kihari while you're on your mission today?"

Kakuzu looked up and gave the fellow missing nin, an unreliable and appalled look. "What the hell has happened to you? You were the psycho plant-freak that ate anyone on the spot. Now look at you! You're such a sap now ever since you got your girlfriend!"

Before he could go on, there was a scream, making the two boys hastily leave the room. Miyuki stood behind a furious Kihari, who had somehow gotten off her 'leash', and beat the living shit out of Hidan, who lay on the floor in a bloody heap. Kakuzu hooked his arms under hers, and pulled her back. Kihari was hissing and spitting like an angry cat.

"Let go! Let go!" She growled, before Kakuzu sushed her.

"Give it up, he's IMMORTAL." Kakuzu said.

She froze. "I-Immortal?"

"That's right, baby!" Hidan smiled, grabbing her ankle, licking his lips. "And you just caused me loads of pleasure, love."

"Back OFF, Hidan." Kakuzu hissed, his stitches coming undone, turning a dark green color. Hidan frowned, but let go of her ankle, before she growled.

"PIG!!" She snarled, before kicking him in the face, making him grunt, before Kakuzu threw her over his shoulder.

"That's enough, trouble making today, little girl." He said, going straight back to his room, and locking the door behind him.

* * *

#Elsewhere#

The two creatures stomped onto the grounds of their home village- once-upon-a-time, anyways. The two fire foxes, stared in horror, at their now burned-down village. They looked at one another, before running towards the remains of the village.

"Kihari! KIHARI!" They growled, furiously, pawing through the ashes. "Where is she?!"

The larger, brown-furred on, stopped, looking at the smaller yellow-brown one. "We CAN'T tell father. We just can't..."

"Wait-" The smaller one said, sniffing the ashes of what was once their house, smiling. "-I don't smell her- she didn't die here-"

"But-(sniffs air)- what the hell is this other disgusting scent? It's- masculine- like a males scent-"

The smaller one sniffed the ground. "Got her scent." The larger one followed, while the smaller one, played out what happened in their village.

"Miyuki and Kihari- startled- being chased- resulted in them fleeing into the old warehouse,where they soon ran outside. Kihari put up a fight, but- (sniffs around)-apparently, she either got what she wanted, or she chased after the guys."

"Yes- just like our Kihari-" The larger one sneered sinisterly. "Let's go get our other brothers- after we find her- give those stupid humans a good scare." The smaller one grinned.

"You're the'Tactic-King', Oran- if not the second largest in the family- standing at 10' on all fours, 15' on your hind legs." The smaller one said." Oh- I got their scent-"

"Lead away, little brother." The larger one sneered, before running after the smaller one.

* * *

(A/N: Sorry its so short! I seriously need ideas guys. My tank is like- empty- literally. I'm having MAJOR writer's block on the things every one wants me to update so badly. So, if you could send in ideas, that would help. No matter how stupid or long or confusing they are to you,or to me, I WILL read them all. Thx. -Luv Ryu 3)


	7. Games and Blushing

Affairs with the Maids

Chapter 6- Games and Blushing

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Kakuzu sat on his bed, trying to find a way around this. He was going on a rather long mission- but he couldn't just leave Kihari behind. Deidara seemed attracted to her, so that was a problem, and his own partner, tried to rape her. It was a bit too much, to leave her behind. He sighed, checking the clock. Why? He had his mission in three hours- he'd make it.

He stood and went over to the laundry room. Kihari was doing her maid duties, and washing laundry- Miyuki was occupying herself, with mending all the rips at tears, in the members' clothing.Currently, she was finishing one of Hidan's shirts, and looked up at the sound of his foot steps.

"Good Morning, Kaku-Sama." She smiled happily. "I think Ki-Chan is outside-"

Kakuzu stopped, looking at her, confused. "Why would she be outside?"

"Oh! you don't know?" Miyuki questioned cutely. "Ki-Chan- she doesn't like washing machines or dryers. She doesn't know how to use them, because she's from a big family of boys. A washer wouldn't fit their laundry. So, she does laundry in a tub of water, and hangs them outside to air-dry." Miyuki explained.

This was kind of a shock, to Kakuzu. "How many family members- does she have?"

Miyuki gasped. "Oops! I wasn't supposed to say that! Erm- c-can you ask Ki-Chan?" Kakuzu shrugged, walking outside.

"You're the hottest thing I've seen in YEARS!" Hidan's voice whined.

"I said NO. So just fuck off, alright?" Kihari could be heard, as Kakuzu walked up, to see Hidan bothering her, as she hug up a pair of Itachi's jeans, on the clothes line.

Her fox ears twitched, tilting, catching the vibration of his foot steps, and she turned to look at him. A happy smile graced her lips, as she let out a shallow sigh. She seemed- happy- he was there. Probably because he'd chase off Hidan. And he did.

"Hidan- knock it off." Kakuzu warned his partner, stopping next to her. "Kihari, how many members are there in your family?"

"9." She answered in an angered tone.

"Thank you."

Kihari looked up at him in confusion. "Why did you want to know, rag doll?"

He frowned. "God-forbid I'd like to learn more about you, Kihari."

Hidan was busy counting on his fingers, having failed kinder garden, before he smiled. "Dude, you have the same number of brothers and sisters as the Akatsuki!" He said, quietly rejoicing, on his fabulous counting 'skillz'.

"Shut up, Hidan, I'm trying to have a conversation here." Kakuzu said coolly.

"You shut up!" Hidan snapped back.

Kihari stood there and watched, as Hidan and Kakuzu bicker at one another. Kihari sighed, untying her hair, which had been in a bun, and letting it fall down her back like a waterfall.

"Can you two go away- please?" Hidan looked at her- having been keeping his eye on her- and frowned. Kakuzu was silent. He only watched, as she hung up two more pairs of jeans- both a dark green color, making Kakuzu raise an eyebrow in suspicion.

"Who's are those?"

"Zetsu." Kihari said simply, as if it was common knowledge, that Zetsu wore human clothes.

"Hidan, so away-" Kakuzu said, the white-haired man glaring at him angrily.

"Why the hell should I?" Kihari grabbed a wet towel, and rolled it up, whipping it in Hidan's direction. The attack connected with his arm, snapping at his skin, making him yelp in shock and surprise at the speed of her bold move. "Fuck, ok, ok, I'm leaving!" Kihari smiled, victorious, in getting the annoying male to finally leave.

"Kihari, you'll be coming with Hidan and I on our-"

"You jerk!" Kihari snapped, rudely cutting him off mod-sentence. "Do I LOOK like your freaking slave, Stitch-Face?"

"You're coming, whether you want to or not, so shut up." Kakuzu said sternly, his tone leaving no room for argument- but she only focused on her laundry in interest.

"I'm not going anywhere unless I have the option to go somewhere, where ever it is you're planning on taking me." Kihari said, not looking at him. He knew her game, and how it worked.

He'd say something, and she'd counter it, then debate. When she was sick of talking to him, she occupied herself and wouldn't give him the time of day. So- he had to basically, earn her attention or the result he wanted.

Kakuzu groaned, rolling his eyes. "Would you like to come with me on my mission with Hidan. Kihari?"

She smiled at him cockily."I'd love to, Kakuzu-KUN." She replied, heavily emphasising the last part of her sentence, making him narrow his eyes at her in hate.

"Oh- you'll pay for that, Kihari-CHAN." He said through gritted teeth, before turning on his heels and leaving.

They had one of those funny relationships. The one where the two say they don't love each other, and they don't get along, when they really do. Opposites attract and hate is an act of passion.

(With Miyuki)

Zetsu had just returned from another mission- he was working a lot. Like, last Thursday, he did 4 missions in a row. I know right?

But to Miyuki, he looked- worse then any other time in the last two and a half months that she and Kihari had been there.

"Z-Zet-Sama, what's wrong?" She asked worriedly. "You ok?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." He said weakly.

His Akatsuki cloak was tattered, adorning rips small and large a like. Where there were rips- there was blood. Miyuki had a hard time, separating what was dried blood from black- it looked to be more blood than cloak. Even his protective fly-trap, was mortally wounded. A very thin trail of blood steadily went from the left corner of his mouth, to his chin.

Miyuki insisted that he lay down, and she got him to sit on his bed, leaning back against the head board to support him, until she came back from his bathroom. A needle, a spool of thick, black, thread, and a wet rag, were set on the bed. She went back and shut the door, before returning to the bed.

"I'll fix your coat, but you'll have to take it off-"

Zetsu had a distant look on his face- like he was zoning out, his eyes held no light. Miyuki helped him out of the cloak, and folded it up, before setting it on the ground next to the bed. She gingerly started to cleaning the sever wounds, then continued to the smaller ones, having to get peroxide at one point. Zetsu inhaled sharply at times, but otherwise, he was silent as he watched her work.

"I think you broke your left arm-"

"Shit."

"But otherwise, the really bad wounds are taken care of." Miyuki said happily, leaning in closer to wipe the blood from his chin. The trap snapped shut, almost slicing off her arm, if she hadn't pulled it back. It opened again, and it must've been a defensive instinct.

She tried again, and it didn't snap on her. Miyuki was positioned in his lap leaning forward to clean him up. When she was done, he grabbed her wrist and kissed her quickly, before releasing her.

"S-Sorry-" He apologized.

"I-It's ok-" Miyuki blushed heavily. She hastily collected what she had taken out, putting it away, before leaving the room to clean the towel and get different thread, to fix Zetsu's cloak.


	8. Hand Holding & Sleeping

Affairs with the Maids

Chapter 7- Hand Holding & Sleeping

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"So- this 'Orochimaru'- what's he like?" Kihari questioned curiously. She had woken up from her nap just a couple minutes ago. Kakuzu and Hidan took turns carrying her, and at the moment, it was Hidan's turn.

"Well- he's kinda weird and has horrible fashion sense. He's kinda creepy too. "Hidan answered.

"In short, stay away from him if you see him, Kihari." Kakuzu said, making the female glare at him.

"Well, how can I avoid him, if I don't even know what the fool looks like?" She demanded sarcastically, making Kakuzu take a deep breath, keeping his eyes on his 'girlfriend'.

"Oh, it's easy!" Hidan smiled. "Orochimaru has long, black hair, and he's really, really pale."

"I've heard, his wife is unnaturally similar to a man-eating beast." Kakuzu said. The shorter male looked at him.

"I think I saw her once- she's a BOMBSHELL!" Hidan smirked, before being hit over the head by his partner.

"We're here-"

"Sweet, let's get a room!"

Kihari was let down from Hidan's back. She stretched, before following the Akatsuki members. She had to walk fast to keep up with the pair, but she managed to stay- somewhat- between them.

Several men whistled at Kihari, throwing her flirty smirks and seductive smiles. Kakuzu caught note of this quickly, and so did Hidan.

Kihari's ears flattened, to the sides of her head. Her arms looped around Kakuzu's left arm, making him look down, as she pulled herself closer to his side. Kakuzu bent down slightly, when she tugged on his cloak.

"I'm scared."

He was a bit taken back by her swallowing her pride, and actually **admitting** she was afraid. The taller male straightened. He'd better fix this problem fairly soon. She wasn't the 'easiest to please' girl in the world.

"Give me your hand." Kakuzu said without emotion, looking straight ahead. Hidan gave him an odd look, putting his hands up as iof to stop him.

"Whoa, dude. I don't like you that way-"

"Not you, moron, Kihari!" The masked-man hissed venomously, looking at Kihari. He tilted his left hand towards her a little closer, before taking it back a little. "Come on." He encouraged her, but she just looked at him. "Trust me."

Kihari seemed a bit reluctant, but she placed her right hand in the one he was holding to her. Almost immediately, his hand seemed to envelope hers. He intertwined his fingers with the smaller hand, he was holding.

Kihari blushed a bit, and Hidan was jealous. But, Kakuzu's awkward action, made a solution for the problem. The on-lookers looked away, when Kakuzu glared at them silently, or after catching sight of the two holding hands. Kihari smiled, happy that they weren't looking at her anymore. Well- not as much as they had before.

* * *

# Akatsuki Base #

'Hmm, hmm,hmm,hm-hmm...'

Miyuki hummed, as she swept the hallways with her trusty broom in hand. She stopped humming, smirking, after she finished. But soon enough, s frown replaced her smile. The girl leaned against her broom with a lonely sigh.

There really wasn't anything to do. The entire base was clean, and the chores were done. Kihari had been taken on a mission with Kakuzu-Sama and Hidan-Sama. That left Miyuki at the base- almost- all alone. She really didn't have anything to occupy her time, anymore.

Zetsu leaned against the wall, watching her. She'd been almost completely oblivious to him, since he had kissed her. He'd constantly try to make-up for it- but she just- didn't react.

To make it worse, she no longer slept in his room, like she was supposed to. She was Tobi's room mate. Actually- she was spending time with Sasori and Tobi- but NOT him. The night before, she was in Sasori's room. Zetsu shuddered, remembering how she was playing 'dolly' with the puppeteer. Trying on all the clothes he wasn't sure would look good, or to make sure they were perfect.

She'd fallen asleep in there, and Sasori was nice enough to let her sleep in his bed. But- it just made Zetsu feel- angry. It was like she was- to him- slutting herself around. He didn't like it at all, and he decided to end it- right now.

"Miyu-Chan."

She looked over at him, turning towards him. She bowed silently, and he bowed slightly back. Zetsu righted himself, opening his mouth to say something, just as she was walking past him. Whipping around, he caught her arm, making her gasp but otherwise, pull her to a stop.

"The 'Silence Treatment' is the BEST you can DO? Really?" Sadness and embarrasment, swirled around slowly, in her sapphire orbs. He let go of her arm, no longer caring if she ran away or not.

"Sometimes, I don't really think you seriously understand what I'm trying to do here, Miyuki." Zetsu said, holding eye contact with her. "I'm trying to make sure you're safe- its not the easiest thing in the world, you know. What I did was out of my own urges and desire, but I do comprehend, it was wrong. But I don't see how your hanging out with Sasori and Tobi, has anything to do with possibly, 'getting back at me'."

He paused for a breath. A pair of small arms were thrown around his stomach. She buried her face into his cloak, her ears flattening, as she cried into the fabric.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" She sobbed, her crying not ceasing. Zetsu timidly put a hand on her back, patting her.

"It's alright." Zetsu said, his tone saying she had his forgiveness. She sniffed, apologizing for crying into his cloak. The male turned on his heels, walking back to his room. leaving Miyuki in the hallway. She realized he was walking away, causing her to run after him. Her broom, fell to the floor, with a clatter, while Zetsu grabbed her hand and lead her back to his room.

She ran over to the bed, before jumping on him, giggling cutely, happy, looking up at him. Zetsu shut the door and turned off the lights, before sitting on the bed, laying back against the pillows. He offered a hand to her lazily, from where he rested, and led her over next to him, so she could lay down with him. He closed his eyes, before he felt his skin prick, making him open his eyes.

Miyuki was n her knees next to him, her finger tips tracing the 'teeth' of his protective plant- just like she had, on the first day she was there. Zetsu closed his eyes, silently focusing- concentrating- on her touch. He didn't mind it anymore- it was relaxing- especially when she'd give him massages, to loosen him up from whatever he had done for the day.

The small warmth, faded, making him a bit angered, opening his eyes to look up. "What's wrong?" She jolted.

"N-Nothing! I-I thought you might not really like me doing that-" She stammered, pulling back her left hand. Her face turned red, when Zetsu grabbed her hand, and held it to his left cheek, his own on top of it, as he closed his eyes.

"I've would've told you if I didn't like it-wouldn't I?"

"Y-Yes-"

Zetso tilted his head to the left slightly, enjoying the warmth of her soft flesh. He could smell the scent of her blood in her veins, biting his lower lip, to not do anything.

"I'm a cannibal, Miyuki." He said calmly, feeling her stiffen and tense, sensing she was going to withdraw her hand. He looked at her frightened face, removing her hand from his cheek as he brought it closer to his mouth. "But make no mistake- I wouldn't hurt you in a million years,Miyuki-" He brought her hand to his lips, kissing her knuckles lightly, her uneasiness melted away instantly.

"Thank you-" She said quietly, sitting down beside him. "Z-Zetsu-Sama- I know you don't want me to but- C-can I come with you on your next mission?"

"I don't want you coming." He said firmly.

"B-But I'll be good! P-Please Zetsu-Sama!" He poked her in the middle of her forehead.

"Go to sleep, Miyuki-Chan-" She slowly closed her eyes. "- you need it." Miyuki sleepily laid against his chest, his cloak, acting as a pillow for her head, as her eyes shut. He looked down at her as she sleep, feeling guilty, that he had used a harmless sleeping jutsu on her.

He stroked her hair, laying his head back, closing his eyes as he slowly fell asleep, still stroking her hair. Sleep came easier to Zetsu now.


	9. No Title

Affairs with the Maids

Chapter 8

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A/N: Now in this chapter, I've included Ryu. If you know ryu, then you're probably excited to be hearing she's preggo with a new BABY in this series- if you don't, then you'll probably come to think, 'Jesus, why would she marry Orochimaru?'

Well, uneducated people, it was Orochimaru who crashed her wedding and, basically, forced her to marry him. She doesn't regret it in the slightest, and adores her husband.

Orochimaru, will be portrayed as a protective and easily jealous male, FYI.

Thank you,

Alex-Chan (Flamist Rika)

* * *

-Zetsu's Room-

Miyuki awoke to the muffled sound of yelling. Zetsu still asleep. She shook him lighly. "Zetsu-Sama, wake up-" Zetsu stirred, getting up.

"What is it?" He asked sleepily, Miyuki clinging to him.

"I'm scared-" She said, squeaking and hiding her face in his cloak where there was a boom- like someone had kicked the wall- hard. He sat up growling. "Why today?" She got off his chest and sat on the bed as he stood up. "Stay here." Miyuki, curious got up and followed Zetsu, hiding behind him, as he opened the door.

"Oh my- I'm so clumbsy-" Zetsu sighed.

"Ryu, what are you doing here?" Zetsu asked, making the girl look up, and smile nervously.

"I-I made brownies- for everyone- but its raining- oh, I'm so terribly sorry, Zetsu-San..." She appologized. Zetsu walked over to the fallen female, offering her a hand, helping her up, two tins of brownies on the floor. "C-Could you get those? Thank you so much-" She noticed the small girl. "Oh- who's the cutie?"

"My girlfriend, Miyuki. You have to watch yourself, Ryu- the baby-"Zetsu said, making her nod. "Pein has been waiting to see you- I'll pass out the brownies."

"Oh, thank you, Zetsu-San! You're so sweet!" The woman smiled, a hand on her stomach, another on her back. "What was that, Pein wanted me? Ok- I'll report in." The woman made her way to Pein's room.

"Who's that, Zetsu-Sama?" Miyuki asked Zetsu quietly.

"That's Kamikoro Ryu- She's the wife of Orochimaru, and a good friend of Leader's." Zetsu said. "She makes the Akatsuki sweets when she can, and brings it over on rainy days- to 'cheer us up'." Zetsu said, as the two watched Pein chat with her, before she walked into his room and the door was shut. "Pein has a major crush on her, but since she's married to Orochimaru, he's too much a gentleman to steal her away from him."

"Miyu-Chan!" Miyuki looked behind her to see Kihari, and was tackled to the ground in a hug. Kakuzu and Hidan stood in the hall.

"What's with the cake tins, Zetsu?" Kakuzu asked.

"They're brownie tins, and they're Ryu's." Zetsu snapped, before opening them up, the scent of freshly made brownies curling up from the pasteries, filling them with the tingling and warming sensation of smell. They all shivered, except Kihari and Miyuki, who only recoiled. "Ryu-San makes the greatest brownies-"

"Why thank you, Zetsu!" They turned to see Ryu, a hand on her stomach, another on her back as she stood there. She smiled charmingly, Pein next to her. Kihari and Miyuki went up to Ryu curiously, sniffinf her. "My, who are these cuties?"

"They work as our maids volunteerily-"

"Oh good, because if they weren't, you know you'd all be laying in pools of your own blood!" She smiled, looking at them. "I'd bent over to pinch your cheeks, but I don't think the baby will like that."

"The fox one is my girlfriend, Kihari. The other one is Zetsu's girl, Miyuki." Kakuzu explained.

"Ki-Chan and Miyu-Chan. You're both so cute. I hope this one's a boy, but I hope he'll be cute too." Ryu said, smiling dreamily, rubbing her stomach in affection and kind. "I don't care if its a boy or a girl- I just hope I can live long enough to see it have its own happy ending."

"So, when are you ditching Orochimaru and getting with Pein, Ryu?" Ryu jerked, before looking down.

"That's enough, Hidan." Pein snapped, looking at Ryu. "I'm so sorry, Ryu-San. Want me to take you back to the Sound?" She shook her head in a 'no'.

"I'm fine. You boys take care of Ki-Hime and Miyu-hime, ok? You take care of them, and they'll take care of you!" Ryu smiled, turning, and making her way out. "I'll invite you boys to the baby shower- bring something nice!" Pein stood there momentarily.

"Go get her, dude!" The guys encouraged, before Pein ran after there, everyone following, as Ryu walked into the rain.

They all stayed in the door way, as Pein stopped, standing in the rain. A male with a black umbrella, stood in the rain- the man's long black hair clung to his kimono top. His bangs clung to his face, but he brushed them away to see. He held out the umbrella, covering Ryu from the rain, smirking gently. "You're- getting soaked." They said warmly. The girls cooed at his sweetness, and Ryu only smiled at him, stepping closer, the man making sure she was protected by the umbrella, as she came closer. He kissed her, looking at Pein, sneering. "I'd like it- if you didn't try to take advantage of my wife's kindness, Pein. You're crossing into dangerous territory." They warned venomously, but smoothly, before turning and walking away.

"Zetsu-Sama, who was that man?" Miyuki asked quietly.

"Orochimaru-" Miyuki saw Orochimaru taking Ryu's hand and kissing her knuckles gently. Orochimaru smiled at her. "Don't be fooled- he's bad news." Miyuki frowned at Zetsu's words, glancing at her friend. Kihari was on edge- hair tail was fluffed up, and her ears were flat against her head, an uneasy growl rumbling in her chest. Miyuki hugged her, and Kihari relaxed considerablly. Miyuki glanced at Pein, who looked angery and sad at the same time. He sighed, straightening the collar of his cloak, and walking back in.

"P-Pein-San!" Pein looked at Miyuki. "D-Do you want me to help you with Ryu-San?" Pein smirked, ruffling her hair, before walking off.

-Later-

Kihari and Miyuki were doing laundry, when Kihari was tapped on the shoulder. "Excuse me- could you ladies tell me where Ki-Chan and Mi-Chan are?" The two girls stood up, to see Orochimaru, who smiled at them. "Well aren't you two just adorable!" He cooed, standing up, showing off a pair of pink bags. "Ryu-Chan made these for you- she says she hopes you like them and her brownies, and apologizes for not being able to give them to you herself- its quite painful for her to walk over here and two trips is murder." Orochimaru said. "This one if for Ki-chan, and the other one is for Mi-Chan." Orochimaru smirked, giving them their appropriate bags, before vanishing. The two looked at one another, looking in their bags.

"WOW! This is so pretty!" Miyuki cooed, pulling out a dark blue maid outfit. Kihari had a matching one- the two hurried up with the laundry and changed into the outfits- they were a perfect fit. "And Ryu-San make these?"

"I suppose-" Zetsu and Kakuzu walked in. "How do these outfits look on us, boys? Ryu-San made them for us."

"Strip." Zetsu said. "I don't want to EVER see you wearing such a thing in front of me again." He said, turning and leaving. Miyuki stood there, Kihari looked at her.

"...Miyu-Chan...?" Kihari asked quietly, before Miyuki lowered her head and muttered something, making Kihari flinch. "Don't Miyu-Chan!" She yelled, but Miyuki had turned and bolted out of sight. "Miyuki, NO!" Kihari yelled, running after her friend, leaving Kakuzu to stand there dumfoundedly.

- Sound Village-

"Ryu- there's a girl here for you." Ryu looked up from her book, taking off her reading glasses.

"Thank you, Orochimaru- let her in-" Orochimaru nodded, letting a small girl step cautiously into the room. "Mi-Chan! Oh, Orochimaru, help me up-" Miyuki ran and hugged Ryu before Orochimaru could get to her.

"He doesn't like me anymore, Ryu-San. I know it must be weird- but I couldn't go to Kihari-Chan- I thought you might help." Ryu closed her eyes halfway. "I just- I'm so confused, Ryu-San!" Orochimaru stood there, silent, he walked over to Ryu, kissing her on the forehead, before walking out, shutting the door behind him.

"Now- tell me everything- lets get it off our chests now, ok honey?" Ryu said gently, stroking her hair comfortingly. "If you tell me- your life story, I'll tell you mine- ok? That way- we can both help one another." Ryu told her.

"But what about-?"

"Orochimaru? He'll stay outside until I call him back in- BECAUSE ORO IS GOOD BOY!" She yelled loud enough for him to hear through those thick doors.

"Now-I'll start. I was born to a rich noble family on another planet-"

-2 hours later-

Zetsu refused to go looking for Miyuki, but Kihari and Kakuzu harassed him into it. They searched for two hours- killing time- not knowing where she had went. Kihari got a random idea. "Maybe- she went to the Sound Village- to see Ryu-San?"

"Tch- stupid girl. Orochimaru is there." Zetsu muttered. Kihari and Kakuzu ran to the Sound Village, somehow navagating through it, until they found Orochimaru sitting outside of a room. He jumped to his feet, getting in an offensive position, readying himself for a fight.

"What do you want now?" He questioned.

"That stupid girl who came here."

"Oh-" Orochimaru relaxed, crossing his arms over his chest. "You can't see her right now..."

"Why the hell not?" Zetsu demanded.

"She's with my wife- if you interupt, you'll get pounded into the ground- she's been itching for a bloody battle lately. You know women and their phermones..." Orochimaru said.

The door opened slightly. "Let them in, Orochimaru- its fine." Orochimaru sneered at them.

"It seems she wants you-" He vanished and suddenly shoved them all into the room. "Into the dragon's den with you! I'd say 'good luck', but that's be the last things you'd hear!" The door was shut behind them. It was a luxorious room- and big. Ryu stood there- unarmed- she looked behind her a bit, making them direct their attention at the girl hiding behind her.

"Zetsu, Miyuki doesnt have much self-confidence. And when you told her she looked bad in that outfit, she thought you were saying you didn't like her."

"It's not that! I don't like the outfit is all! I'm only mad at you, Ryu-San, for making it for her!" Zetsu yelled, Kakuzu sensed danger. Kakuzu wrapped an arm around Kihari's waist, pulling her closer- so he could protect her better if something happened. Ryu stood there, but she narrowed her eyes at Zetsu.

"LOOK, my eggo might be preggo, but I can still whoop your ass!" She threatened. "Orochimaru, how much longer until we go back into Isolation?" She yelled.

"Another month, darling. I'm looking forward to it!" Orochimaru answered enthusiastically.

"Miyuki-Chan- I think you should hang out with Zetsu-San. If it doesn't work, come see us, and we'll take you to our Isolation with us- ok?"

"She is NOT, going to Isolation with you!" Kihari yelled. "All that slaughtyering- for WHAT?! Your own kicks and giggles?"

"I'm sorry you don't know my race's Isolation. We basically sleep away the winter- right Orochimaru?"

"Yes, lovely." Orochimaru smiled, now in the room. Miyuki scurried past him and went to Zetsu. "Now- there is a large illusion outside that will lead you straight to the exit- have a nice day."

The group bowed and left. Zetsu carried Miyuki out bridal-style, as the Sannin and his wife watched.

"Remember when we were like that, Ryu?" Orochimaru asked her slyly, but she only looked up at him curiously.

"I don't remember romance- I remember you killing my cousin to marry me- THEN came the romance. Oh my god, Oreos, wait until you hit your dragonic transformation stage! You're going to be the HANDSOMEST dragon!" He stiffened.

"I-I have to be a dragon?"

"Oh, yeah, if you're not a dragon, then you get the transformation- Do you think you'll have a white mane or a black one?"

"Doesn't matter along as I can still tap that, Goddess!" He remarked, pointing to her, making her smirk.

"HA! Do you honestly think a snake like YOU can keep up with a dragoness like ME?"

"I love it when you put me up with a challenge- so- what's the challenge?" A vein pulsated on the side of her head.

"Are you saying that its a breeze to sleep with me, Micheal Jackson Poser?" Now HE was the one with the pulsating vein.

"I'm saying its easy to get in your pants sometimes! I have to work to get the damn job done!" He complained, before she stood up on her tip-toes and kissed him on the tip of his nose.

"Shut up, Oreos. "She giggled lightly, making him blush. "I'm happy- that you took my cousin's place, Oreos-ok? I'm tired- I don't want to argue." She smiled charmingly. She walked off, leaving him there, his face beet red. He groaned, covering it with a hand.

_'Why does she have to be so damn CUTE?!'_ He wondered, feeling embarrassed for letting a woman get to him, but then he remembered they were married- so it was all good. He smiled- who would care if his wife got to him?

"Way to go, Master Orochimaru!"

"EHHH---?!" He looked at the door to see the sound five all piled up there. They smiled and gave him a thumbs up, pissing him off. "W-What did you see?!"

"Ryu-Chan-sensei getting cuddly with you." Tayuya said simply.

"G-Get out of here you peeping toms!" Orochimaru exclaimed, shoving them out and closing the door, back against it. "Man- why can't Isolation come sooner?" He moaned, before walking off.


End file.
